


Where the Moonlight Falls

by liketolaugh



Series: Conflict of Interest [5]
Category: D.Gray-man
Genre: Aromantic Lenalee Lee, M/M, Protectiveness, Shovel Talk
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-16
Updated: 2019-09-16
Packaged: 2020-10-19 20:29:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,473
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20663312
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/liketolaugh/pseuds/liketolaugh
Summary: Lenalee Lee doesn't understand what Allen sees in Link, but she does understand how badly he could get hurt in this. And she really, really hates it.





	Where the Moonlight Falls

**Author's Note:**

> Hey, y'all! I know I haven't been in this fandom for so long, but I was thinking about it tonight and I found this fic laying around and I just had to wrap it up and post it.
> 
> I once had grand plans for it - it probably would've been at least three times as long, and Link and Lenalee would've become cautious friends - but to be honest I'm just as happy with this outcome, I think.

When Lenalee was fourteen, Komui sat her down, side by side on her bed, and gave her The Talk.

Because it was Komui, of course, it was full of stuttering and flailing and vague threats at boys who didn’t quite exist yet, and also a whole lot of medical terms that Lenalee half-wondered if she should know already, what with the ease with which Komui wielded them – and really it wasn’t nearly as painful as the one Kanda had bitched about Tiedoll giving him, a couple years before.

And once they’d gotten through all the awkward stumblings of procedure and biology and risks and ‘be careful, Lenalee, please be careful’, Komui asked, with a pinched face and worried eyes and a light grip on her hand, “Have you been having any of these… feelings, Lenalee?”

Well, no matter how much Lenalee loved her brother, she really wasn’t going to talk to him about the things she sometimes thought about at night, feelings and wants. “Do I like anybody, you mean?” she prodded cautiously, shifting to face him a little more now that the worst was over.

Komui grimaced, probably at the very thought, but nodded and then added, “You and Kanda are very close.”

He sounded less averse to that idea than to that of abstract, nonexistent boys. Huh.

She wrinkled her nose anyway. “I don’t want to kiss Kanda,” she said, probably more dismissively than she should have. “And dating him would be _awful.”_

Komui laughed a little, a note of relief in it that Lenalee ignored with a flash of an exasperated smile. “Someone else, then?” he asked, amusement lingering in his voice even as his smile faded and his eyes refocused on hers.

Someone else to- what? To hold hands with all the time? To share half of everything with no matter what? To mind and hold above everyone else in her life, all of her chosen family?

One and only. Other half. Partner for life.

“It doesn’t sound that interesting,” Lenalee shrugged, and that was that.

* * *

It took time, practice, and exposure, but eventually Lenalee started to learn to recognize romance in the world around her – it wasn’t important to her, but it was important to her friends. She could tell because of how Kanda went still when he thought of ‘that woman’, and how Marie and Miranda acted when they were together, touching and smiling. She could see it in Krory’s eternal mourning and the way Jerry grew a little more sincere around her brother.

Still, it was no surprise that, most of the time, it had to be pointed out to her.

“They’re so sweet together,” Krory murmured one day in the cafeteria, hiding a rare smile behind his hand, eyes glittering and free of ghosts.

“Marie and Miranda?” Lenalee guessed, glancing up at him while amusement tugged at her mouth. As sad as his memories of Eliade always made him, he seemed to _adore _watching other people in happier relationships, even strangers on the street. And he was _uncanny _at recognizing them.

Krory shook his head, paused, and then amended with another, unhidden smile, “Well, of course. I was thinking of Allen and Link, though.”

Most of Lenalee’s good mood evaporated immediately, her smile fading away as an ice scarf settled around her shoulders. “Allen and Link?” she echoed uncomprehendingly.

She knew, of course, that Allen and Link had actually been getting along quite well in recent months. It was only natural; Allen was so friendly, so kind, that no one could resist him for long, even the stone-hearted CROW who’d come bearing accusations of heresy and betrayal. She knew they were almost friends, now.

Despite this, Lenalee had been keeping her distance from them. She missed Allen, of course, but Link- the _CROW- _She couldn’t.

But she would have noticed a relationship that deep forming. Wouldn’t she have?

Krory smiled, a puzzled twist to his lips. “Yes. Look at them. They’re smitten.” His smile faded, and the ghost of Eliade returned to his eyes.

Lenalee shifted her hand to his arm in a gesture of absent comfort, and, distracted, she looked.

Allen and Link were halfway across the room, Allen’s mountain of food half-gone and Link’s finished entirely. They were sitting close, she noticed with a slight frown, and Allen was leaning slightly into Link; he was smiling, a warm and soft one that Lenalee had never seen before – or had, she realized, but only around Link. Link’s face, in turn, was as unreadable as ever, except- except all of his attention was on Allen, and his eyes were maybe a little wider, a little less wary. A lot less wary.

They were holding hands.

“Oh,” she said, head dipping slightly and mouth twitching into a small and worried wince, her brow wrinkling to match.

The problem wasn’t that Allen had someone else, someone who could be his other half, true love, soulmate. Lenalee wasn’t given to jealousy.

The problem was that it was Link, and Lenalee didn’t trust Link a fraction as far as she could throw him, and she _certainly _didn’t trust him with Allen’s less-than-sturdy emotional wellbeing.

Because Lenalee had seen Kanda in a Mood, heard his murmurs and seen him reach in his sleep, and she had heard Krory wake from nightmares and then cry and cry and cry. And she’d long noticed Allen’s uncertainty, the gingerness with which he handled his relationships, his eagerness to please and his willingness to be hurt.

Link could _hurt _Allen with this, and even though he hadn’t done anything of the sort, Lenalee kind of hated him for it. (She kind of hated him for a lot of things he hadn’t done.)

Lenalee needed to talk to Allen.

“Good for them,” she said neutrally, offering Krory a smile, and he gave her one that was all too sincere in return.

* * *

Cornering Allen without Link hovering right over them was- difficult. It was why she hadn’t done it sooner, just praying that Link would _leave, _soon, so she wouldn’t have to miss Allen anymore. But this couldn’t wait, certainly not until Link left.

Eventually, she managed it on a day when Link and Allen went into the empty kitchen – Allen offering to wash the dishes of the day and Link baking… something. Link was across the overlarge kitchen, having politely left them to talk more or less alone. Apparently she was considered trustworthy enough, after all the years she’d been with the Order, not to have to supervise her interactions with Allen.

She hated how true it was.

Allen seemed happy, though, and Lenalee already felt better about it, despite being hyperaware of Link’s presence. She smiled a little, still scrubbing at the dishes side-by-side with Allen as he chattered.

“-and then _Lavi _interfered and called Kanda a pansy and Link had to go and pull them- Lenalee?” Allen cut himself off, a worried furrow appear between his eyebrows.

Lenalee bit her cheek, dropping her gaze to the plate she was washing, and then offered after a moment, “You and Link are getting along… really well.”

Allen’s expression wavered, brightening for a split second before the worry returned, focused on her even as she didn’t meet his gaze. His hands, ungloved for once, had gone still, and she could see the exposed cross on his hand.

“Yeah,” he agreed cautiously. “He’s… really nice, once you get past the awkwardness.” A hint of a dancing smile, under the worry. “He makes some amazing sweets, too.”

_Awkwardness, _Lenalee thought dryly, but then she’d sometimes applied the same euphemism to Kanda’s hostility. She rinsed off a dish, set it aside, and then planted her hands on the rim of the sink and turned back to Allen.

“Krory said you were together,” Lenalee said at last. “The way Marie and Miranda are together.”

Because she was looking at him, Lenalee caught the flash of wide-eyed surprise that crossed Allen’s face, the open mouth and the slight start. Then it passed and he ducked his head, a slight flush rising to his cheeks, and, as if he couldn’t control it, he smiled again, just a little, shy and sweet.

“Sorry,” Allen offered, tone sheepish. “We didn’t really tell anybody, because…” He shrugged, an all-encompassing _you know. _And Lenalee did. Really.

But Lenalee wasn’t interested in incriminating her friend. Just Link.

“It’s fine,” she assured him. And then, also disinterested in lying to Allen, “But- why him, Allen?”

Allen was quiet for a long time, smile fading. He finished washing the dish he had in his hands, set it aside with Lenalee’s, and then went as far as drying his hands off and lacing his fingers together before he set them on the rim of the sink as well. He didn’t put his gloves back on.

Finally, he looked back at Lenalee, smiling again – small and helpless and fond.

“He’s _nice, _Lenalee,” he said, and his tone matched his smile exactly. “He cares a lot about me. He notices when something’s wrong and he stays up to make sure I sleep, he scolds me for getting hurt and makes sure I get patched up- And he’s so awful at cheering me up, he stutters and falters and he never knows what to say but he tries anyway.” His smile deepened a little, ridiculously, a crinkle at the corners of his eyes. “And he gets embarrassed so easily and talks in his sleep sometimes and mutters at his paperwork and when he gets really frustrated he starts waving his hands as if that means something-”

He looked- silly. Silly in love in the same way that made Krory sigh and smile and say _‘smitten’._

Lenalee sighed, took her hands off the counter, and leaned over to give Allen a hug. He faltered for a moment, speech halting abruptly, before he hugged her back, tight and earnest.

“I really love him, Lenalee,” Allen said quietly, painfully honest in a way that Lenalee felt in her bones.

Lenalee let go and Allen did too, and one hand went back to the counter while the other lingered at Allen’s, just a few fingers ghosting on the back of his left hand, his wide silver eyes fixed to hers.

“I’m worried about you, Allen,” she said bluntly, brown eyes intent on his. “But you seem happy, at least. You deserve that.”

Allen smiled at her, bright and pleased, and after a beat, she returned it, not Allen’s sunlight smile but a smaller one offering honesty and friendship.

Eventually, she drew her hand away and put both of them into the water, fishing out a fork. “I’ll make nice,” she added, hiding an anxious grimace. “Promise.”

“Thank you,” Allen said, voice holding echoes of delight and something like relief, and then he got back to work too, and both of them moved on.

* * *

Lenalee considered leaving it at that. She’d checked in with Allen, and he’d seemed certain and comfortable – doing much more could be overstepping in many ways (though Allen would never complain.)

But.

Lenalee didn’t like leaving things to chance – not important things. It made her antsy and anxious and drew her thoughts to the matter over and over, and eventually she gave in.

Once a week, Link left Allen alone while he was asleep to go deliver his report to Leverrier.

Lenalee didn’t sleep much anyway.

She picked a spot to wait for him, not quite hidden in a turn-off hallway, and heard Link’s steps start to slow as he came closer. If she knew the CROW, and oh, she did, one of his hands would have fallen from his report in preparation to wield a knife, should she prove a threat.

Sure enough, Link took a half-step away and turned toward her just as he reached her hall, one hand raising to a guard position.

In the next moment, he settled from his ready stance, though his faint frown stayed.

“Good evening, Lenalee,” he greeted evenly, straightening up. “You’ve chosen an odd time to be wandering around.”

Lenalee kept her faint scowl. She’d never pretended to like Link, and she wasn’t going to start now. “I was waiting for you,” she said, straightening to match him and meet his gaze. “I wanted to speak to you alone.”

Link raised an eyebrow, looking rightfully wary, but didn’t move from his place. “Without Allen nearby? That’s quite uncharacteristic of you.”

_“Allen,” _she repeated softly, and watched the flush creep across Link’s face. “That’s what I wanted to talk about, actually.”

His brow furrowed, right underneath the double dots. “About Allen?” he echoed, wary.

“About your relationship with him,” she clarified, and Link’s expression grew noticeably more apprehensive. Lenalee shrugged and shook her head. “I won’t tell anyone. But…” She stepped closer, and Link, to his credit, didn’t step away even as she got a little too close for him to be clearly comfortable. Lenalee’s heart was racing too, and she was tense but determined. “I don’t trust you. Not with anything, but especially not with my _friends.”_

She almost spat the last word, and she wouldn’t take this tone with anyone but a CROW.

Link appeared to take a moment to consider his words, eying her with caution but not fear.

“I understand your concerns,” he said at last, soft and careful. “Allen loves very… fullheartedly.” His voice softened noticeably toward the end, and stayed that way as he continued. “It leaves him quite vulnerable; I don’t know how he does it.”

In some ways, Lenalee didn’t either. In others… she couldn’t imagine anything else.

“Do you love him?” she asked, sharp and unforgiving. “Do you even _like _him?”

Link seemed to swallow his first reaction, wavering for just a moment before his gaze turned steely and he lifted his chin, meeting her eyes in what was almost a glare of his own. “More than I knew I was capable of.”

Lenalee was frustrated. But there was only so much she could do for her friends. She understood that much.

The world was an awful place and you couldn’t protect everyone from everything.

She jabbed Link in the chest with her forefinger and glowered at him, feeling brittle and angry and jittery. “If you hurt him, there’s nothing you can do to stop me from finding you,” she warned.

Link regarded her for a long moment, and then tucked his report against his chest and nodded.

“I understand,” he said quietly. He didn’t make false promises, or swear surrender- but he was honest.

That was more than Lenalee expected from most of the Order.

“Good,” she said stiffly, and then turned on her heel and walked away, forcing herself to take a deep breath, her heels clacking against the stone floor. She’d done everything she could.

Now all there was left to do was watch.


End file.
